I hate all lack of communication. I recently lost a friend because of a communication problem. I hate it.
It is very difficult when people communicate online. There are no facial expressions... no smiles... no twinkle in the person's eyes. It is very hard to read someone's thoughts.
This is especially hard when the two people in question don't speak each other's languages natively. It makes it so hard.
Something else that frustrates me: If someone asks you what you want and you tell them "whatever you want is fine". You can't complain about what you get! It does not make any sense. Especially if that person believes that he gave you exactly what you expected.
How can someone be angry in that situation? I don't understand that.
It confuses me.
It saddens me.
I hurt inside.
I feel empty.
Spooning is nice... intimate without sex. It's a closeness that's very comforting and can be very loving. With lovers, it can be a prelude to sex (or something afterwards). With very close friends, it can even just be friendly, but it can be more complicated than that; there are a few problems that may occur. For example:
1) Upper hand placement.
- Assuming I'm in back and on my left side, my right arm has to go somewhere. Whether it's subconscious or not, it always winds up on the boobs. It just seems that the particular angle and position is very comfortable for my arm. I am very respectful of women, so I honestly would not go for the cheap "accidental" grope. I will try to move my hand in a better position... on my hip or hers? Doesn't feel snuggly enough. Arm in front of the boobs, away from her body? Feels very awkward and not intimate enough. Arm in front of boobs, touching, but hand up hear her neck? OK, but awkward position.
So, I wind up closing my fist or facing my hand away so it doesn't seem like I'm trying to grab them.
That problem is partially solved, but then we move onto the larger issue...
2) Accidental arousal
- OK, this has the potential to change the whole dynamics of a budding relationship. It can, at the very least, be really embarassing. At the worst, can make a girl think you're an asshole pervert.
If I am attempting to spoon with someone with whom I have spooned with a lot in the past, like someone I have a long-term sexual relationship with, things will probably be OK or at least not a big issue. But, if I don't know this person well, or this is a potential relationship, I'll probably get a little... err... aroused, which can complicate things. This is mostly an involuntary problem.
The worst thing about this situation is that my brain will sabotage me. I will think to myself "Shit... I better not get hard". OF course, this makes me think about it. Then my mind will think about all the things that could be accomplished with my fully aroused state. I will literally bite my tongue to try to stop the reaction, but, as any man knows, the close proximity of warm soft woman-flesh pretty much predetermines my failure.
So then I am left with either the awkwardness of both of us being very aware of my erection and her being too polite to say anything, or hearing her say "Umm... Is that your dick?". The only true option I have is to awkwardly bend at the waist a little bit more so that the front of my groin is not touching the back of her body. This is not comfortable, and she still knows what happened.
Sometimes I feel like I'm putting too much thought into things. Man, why is life so complicated?
Is it me or are there a lot more breasts in this year's American Idol?
I'm not complaining. In fact, I'm rewinding and watching again, just to make sure :)
I just read a rumor that Jennifer Love Hewitt is doing a spread in Playboy. Now, I haven't even seen a copy of that magazine in YEARS, but I might just have to buy it to see that. I have had a crush on that girl for years. She and Alyssa Milano have been my long-term Hollywood crushes.
... *pause for mental threesome* ...
I am wondering if I am the only person out there who masturbates for 2-4 hours....
Anyone else do that?
I had a dream last night that I tracked down my ex-gf. I haven't seen or heard from her in a long time. I wonder what she's been doing.
I just realized that I still remember what all of her body parts look like in detail.
Is that unusual?